counting my blessings

I have to be honest..... I have been so sad lately and really have had a hard time encouraging my self to get through these last few weeks. I have been on the really down part of life determining weather or not its even worth to go through anymore. I have been over loaded with so much from school and other people determining on me. I don't feel like I have a life. The past few weeks I have been living in the library of my school. I come early in the morning to my first class starting at 6:30 am and then stay at school studying and going to classes till some day 10 pm. I am only getting about two hours of sleep every night. I have come to a point of really thinking I have gone crazy. I am a fifth year student in college and feeling the pressure from other people to graduate this semester. I am taking the most hard classes of my life and trying to retain information with getting a good grade. I am physically, mentally, and anything worn out. The string is cut. This is when I have honestly thought of taking my own life.....

This week was interesting... i think that once you have truly hit rock bottom people are then brought into your life to uplift you. I a

m eternally grateful for the support and love that has been given to me the last few weeks. Many tears and frustrations I have shared with a few of my close friends.

To Liesl, Emily, and Elaine.

Liesl can truly tell when something is wrong. I can be smiling all day and yet she can still tell that im not doing well. She will take time to show her affection by asking if she could do anything. I have always loved this girl. She is one that I trust and adore. I consider her as a true friend and one that I will be friends with for the rest of my life. She is so sweet.

Emily

My best friend in the world! I have been talking to her about all the things I have been going through. She has three kids and going on forth. She is an amazing super women. She and I stay in touch 24 seven. I can always depend on her in helping me with anything. I love her kids. Her whole family has brought so much joy in my life. I honestly don't know what I would do with out her. Just this week I had a dance lab that I was not excited to be at. Emily and her kids showed up as my fan club.

Elaine

She is my step mother. I love her as my own mother. I showed up last weekend doing homework and she and I talked till late that night. She definitely understands what I am going through in college and knows what it takes to go through. Elaine stayed up late that night just talking and listening to me. She gives me the best advise and encourages me to get through. She always has the right things to say. I love her so much and am so grateful in having her in my life. She is my role model. I new that she was planning on going to bed early that night but instead she stayed up with me eating crackers and cheese. I needed to that encouragement.

There has been so many time in my life that I was struggling. I am so grateful for these people in my life. I honestly don't think I would be here with out them. This is the honest truth. I wouldn't be the way I am today without their help. Always be grateful and count your blessings.