L.E.A.P

L - Leap into Life 


E - Evolve into excellence 


A - Attain Confidence

P - Pursue

I have had allot to think about this summer. Allot has been on my mind. I was offered a job at UVU for teaching. This was a great opportunity for myself but it has got me thinking .... I am not sure if I want to be teaching in a studio quit yet and give up my performance. I enjoy performing and dancing and feel like I have not reached my limit yet. I only have a amount of years till I will be having a bars stuck down my back. Im not ready to give the stage up. Till I am havingto slow down then I will be teaching in the studios. Don't get me wrong.... i have loved teaching and coaching for others. I just feel that if I stick at where I have been at for the last 6 years I am limiting my self. I am wanting to do so much more in my life. This past year I have beentold by variety of close friends and mentors that I should go for it. I have been so nervous and unsure of my self. I feel like I am in a black room and cant see where I am going. Im afraid of getting hurt, or weather I can or can't do it. I have been in this very same place that I have become very confertable. I'm wanting a challenge and to grow just a little bit more. So here I go.... I am taking this leap of faith and hoping that I may find what I've been looking for. wish me luck!


Dancing With The Stars

This was a chance of a life time. I had so much fun! It was a dream come true.

I love every person on this team. Sharring this chance of a life time together made us even closer becomming best of friends. This team became my family.

I invited Briana Walker because she is such an inperation to me. I love this girl and was so excited that she could come and share this experiance with me. Also my hubby Enoch Wadsworth who has supported me through out all of my dance. I was so happy that he got to come along. This was somthing I will never forget.

Alayne Graduates

Its been an amazing few months and so much has happend. Finally! I was able to walk in April and recieve my Ballroom major at the end of this summer. I never thought that I wouls make it this far. There were so many ups and down and now I am feeling on top of the world. So much accomplished and more goals to set.

My husband took this picture out side at UVU after the Graduations cerimony. I was so happy and what a great shot. Only took two trys.

My wonderful friends in the Dance prograhm. I would not be where I am today with out these best freinds who helped me get there.

This was so exciting for me and other. I am the first in my family to graduate from college. What a accomplishment and wonderful support from my family and friends.

counting my blessings

I have to be honest..... I have been so sad lately and really have had a hard time encouraging my self to get through these last few weeks. I have been on the really down part of life determining weather or not its even worth to go through anymore. I have been over loaded with so much from school and other people determining on me. I don't feel like I have a life. The past few weeks I have been living in the library of my school. I come early in the morning to my first class starting at 6:30 am and then stay at school studying and going to classes till some day 10 pm. I am only getting about two hours of sleep every night. I have come to a point of really thinking I have gone crazy. I am a fifth year student in college and feeling the pressure from other people to graduate this semester. I am taking the most hard classes of my life and trying to retain information with getting a good grade. I am physically, mentally, and anything worn out. The string is cut. This is when I have honestly thought of taking my own life.....

This week was interesting... i think that once you have truly hit rock bottom people are then brought into your life to uplift you. I a

m eternally grateful for the support and love that has been given to me the last few weeks. Many tears and frustrations I have shared with a few of my close friends.

To Liesl, Emily, and Elaine.

Liesl can truly tell when something is wrong. I can be smiling all day and yet she can still tell that im not doing well. She will take time to show her affection by asking if she could do anything. I have always loved this girl. She is one that I trust and adore. I consider her as a true friend and one that I will be friends with for the rest of my life. She is so sweet.

Emily

My best friend in the world! I have been talking to her about all the things I have been going through. She has three kids and going on forth. She is an amazing super women. She and I stay in touch 24 seven. I can always depend on her in helping me with anything. I love her kids. Her whole family has brought so much joy in my life. I honestly don't know what I would do with out her. Just this week I had a dance lab that I was not excited to be at. Emily and her kids showed up as my fan club.

Elaine

She is my step mother. I love her as my own mother. I showed up last weekend doing homework and she and I talked till late that night. She definitely understands what I am going through in college and knows what it takes to go through. Elaine stayed up late that night just talking and listening to me. She gives me the best advise and encourages me to get through. She always has the right things to say. I love her so much and am so grateful in having her in my life. She is my role model. I new that she was planning on going to bed early that night but instead she stayed up with me eating crackers and cheese. I needed to that encouragement.

There has been so many time in my life that I was struggling. I am so grateful for these people in my life. I honestly don't think I would be here with out them. This is the honest truth. I wouldn't be the way I am today without their help. Always be grateful and count your blessings.

The road ahead

okay well the christmas tree is down. How depressing really. I felt that I never really got to enjoy the Christmas season. I totally felt like I missed it this year. My husband and I are still trying to scrape by with money and still looking for some type of car to get to and from school. Homework is pilling up and deadlines are coming. I feel a little stress right now. I have to get through this last year. I have to. I cant wait to graduate and get on with my life. I often wonder what it will be like when I graduate. I have been going to school my whole life. What am I going to do with my self after.

I am looking forward to the changes but terrified to take this huge step in life. Someone told me today that it must feel great to know that your graduating so soon. But I said I have not felt that great yet still wondering when it will hit me.

I have been going through school for five years and still have about two semesters left. So close but I feel like its so far away. I am not one that gets A's on every assignment/ Class. I have had to take extra classes on the side plus allot of extra time spent in any assignment. I am constantly struggling to get through every class I take.

college was never been easy and I felt that I had to go through allot more crap than other people had to go through just to get a passing grade. I hope this all pays off one day! My piggy bank in life is not looking so good.

Car troubles thats my life

Okay so another year and new resolutions. My husband has often told me, "you make it a Good day." Now i decided to take that account this year and constantly tell my self those words. (as cheese as it is) I think this will help me think more positive and confidant about my self. So here we go.....

Wow so i wrote that a while ago make that three weeks ago. Today was the official first day of class for this semester in school. I was excited to start dancing again and learn more. I reminded my self to make it a good day.

My husband and I are going through some hard times claiming BK last year was one large thing we went through. My husband went through three jobs. We were no were near being financially stabled. Luckily enough my husband is back working for a company about 45 min away from home. Well now with school starting its been a little rough trying to get around with only one vehicle. We are out looking. Cant afford anything don't know what we are going to be able to do.

In the mean time my parents are letting us barrow an old honda accord 87 of theirs. I go to school for my first meeting then came home for a few hours to then go back out to start the car when the car wouldn't start (i think it is officially dead). Talk about trying to make you day a good day.

lets keep trying so for now I just have to laugh about it. I may just invest in making a Flintston Car. I hear their great on Gas!

TEst Test

Well its finals week and I am sure thousands of students feel the same way I do. I have taken 7 test and still have at least three more to go. I am in my last year of collage and ready to move on if they will let me. I struggle with taking tests and have often had to talk to teachers about helping me out in the class to pass. For the first time in my whole schooling life time i failed a class. I feel so stupid and Im sure i will beat my self up for the next few months over it. I worked so hard in this class. i had study groups, teaching others, hours on my own, and many other ways to cram all this stuff in my head. Some how i failed. I cant talk to a the teacher because he, "really cant help." wow I feel like scum and don't know if a whole tub of delicious chocolate ice cream will sooth me down.

I keep telling my self keep going and you will make. I think I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel just hope its not a train reck. So here I go another semester of pulling hair and tiers. wish me luck. I am really needing it!